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January 18, 2008

My story A Letter Of Complaint is online at Spacesuits And Sixguns

The new issue of Spacesuits and Sixguns Magazine is online and it includes my story A Letter Of Complaint.

If you've ever done your grocery shopping online (as is increasingly common in the UK) - and have been left baffled at the produce that actually turns up - then this one is for you.

To: CustomerService@EveryonesSupermarket.co.uk
Subject: Order query

        I am mailing you to query my recent order with reference number 1394691346193. This morning at breakfast I was disheartened to discover that the eggs delivered to my fridge were free range. I always refrain from buying free range eggs, as I believe them to be an obvious pricing scam. I've seen the documentaries - a barn sitting in a large field, doors wide open. In the field totter five brave chickens, whilst inside the barn the remaining three thousand sit squashed side by side thinking, "I'm not going out there. It's cold." So I would never allow you, the supermarket, to tempt me into paying disproportionate prices just to have those barn doors open. I would be grateful if you could please send me a carton of barn eggs and compensate me for the inconvenience caused.

Thank you,

Joe Bollingsworth.

...continue reading A Letter Of Complaint


Funny story, James. Loved it!

I really liked that, James!